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I've divided this chronicle of my life into four parts:
Although each post in the blog can stand alone, if you are not already familiar with my story, I would recommend reading two entries first: How They Met and Early Childhood. You can also utilize the index for a catalog of all posts that have been written as well as those in progress.
(When, after almost four years, my mother finally gained limited access to her entire lifetime of possessions, I skipped ahead to a fifth part: Fast Forward.)
When asked about my story, Bill insists that I'm the problem; I encourage you to read "How Toxic Families Choose a Child to Scapegoat." (external link) If you'd like to learn more about how this could happen, I recommend a recent article: 'Narcissistic abuse' has gone mainstream. But what is it? Skeptics say it's just a trendy hashtag. Survivors say it describes the unimaginably manipulative relationships they've escaped.
Where will you draw the line? Perhaps you truly didn't know. Or, maybe you had clues over the years - possibly even thinking the relationship between Bill & DeNese was toxic but it wasn't any of your business and choose to look the other way. Regardless, silence allowed this to perpetuate.
I don't doubt that it probably isn't easy to reconcile the charming friend you think you know with the atrocious abuse my mother and I endured. However, continuing to remain friends with Bill tells the world that you don't have a problem with this type of behavior.
This question unfairly assumes DeNese is to blame. The real question should be: "Why is Bill Mountjoy abusive?" (It also overlooks the reality that DeNese was increasingly extorted.)
Nevertheless, DeNese did try to escape - several times! These efforts are described in: Prison Break - Attempts 1 & 2, Prison Break - Attempt 3, and Prison Break - Attempt 4. Two upcoming posts (Emergency Protective Order, and Proposed Settlement Agreement) will also describe additional efforts to separate.
If you'd like to learn more about why it is so challenging to break free from domestic violence, check out "Why it takes women 7 attempts to leave an abusive relationship - and how you can help." (external link).
Furthermore, we should all be asking why Bill didn't just leave? If you have known the two of them in person, can you think of a time Bill had anything genuinely positive to say about DeNese? Reflecting back on the last four decades, I struggle struggle to come up with even a single example - and it's not as if DeNese has any shortage of positive attributes. My personal conclusion is that Bill Mountjoy stayed for financial gain.
(Please note that the answer below was written prior to a judgement in the partition case. DeNese officially moved from the Vienna home in September of 2023. Neither one of us have any desire in remaining at 402 Roland St SW.)
Maybe but I think this question is completely irrelevant. Nevertheless, I will briefly entertain it because, if you know Bill personally, one of the frequent ways Bill tries to re-frame the partition sale is by claiming that we are "living in a mansion" and the Vienna home should be sold to purchase something more reasonable.
The Vienna house may be spacious but it's far from luxurious. The condition of the home is atrocious. Nevertheless, it's pretty much the only thing my mother has left that is familiar after not being able to return to her home in Lorton meant she lost an entire lifetime of possessions - including her pets and photographs. The idea that she should let go of the Vienna home as well could only be justified by an irrational barbarian. Besides - the numbers make it clear that Bill cashed out his interest years ago; insisting otherwise is theft - legal, perhaps, but that doesn't make it right.
I haven't wanted to live in the Vienna home since 2014. I tolerated the conditions because I have been my mother's sole source of emotional support; by being here, she would always have somewhere to run. I don't deny that it's easier to get the medical care I need in a major metropolitan area, such as Northern VA. Also, in the process we developed some incredible friendships with the community. However, the condition of the house also made us all sick. None of this really matters, though; the real question to ask is not why we lived in Vienna but why Bill feels entitled to take my mother's property.
No. While Bill is litigious and people can be sued for practically anything these days, I'm not troubled by the possibility of another lawsuit because what I have shared here is true.
These are the actual events in my life as candidly as my recollection permits. Also, so much of this was already public information due to police reports on various incidents over the years and litigation he decided to thrust upon us less than six months after my mother's catastrophic hospitalization that he may very well have caused. Furthermore, the information that really should have been kept confidential here - such as the date and location of my birth - is actually about me .
I am unemployed, disabled and receive government assistance. I managed - predominately due to assistance from DeNese. In 2020, I became DeNese's caregiver despite needing a caregiver myself. I am barely keeping my food on the table. Nevertheless, in 2021, Bill petitioned the court to partition DeNese's home and the home in Vienna where I lived - both of which had his name on the title. Meanwhile, he conspired with his affluent buddies to keep DeNese from her entire lifetime of possessions so I could barely assist her in pasting together a defense.
In 2022, Bill cancelled my health insurance. He did so with no warning whatsoever; I only found out when I began receiving bills for prior medical care. Bill wasn't even paying for my insurance himself because he was quite familiar with using the legal system as his personal bully. When Bill was fired from the AFL-CIO, he sued them and (obviously wanting to go through what I endured) they handed him a settlement package that included health insurance for all three of us. Bill had already cancelled DeNese's insurance years earlier due to a disagreement with her for a few hundred dollars.
In 2024, Bill evicted me from my home rather than working with my Legal Aid attorney on a resolution. Since January of 2019, I had been on the waiting list for a Housing Choice Voucher. In a country where most people struggling with low incomes can't even get on a waiting list for government-sponsored housing, I had the extremely good fortunate of finally making it to the top of the waiting list. Nevertheless, Bill couldn't hold his horses long enough for me to move into Section 8 project.
Bill's approach to pretty much everything illustrates more about his character than anything I could ever write. This website was up for several years now, and I was not sued. I take that as indication that Bill knew, just as much as I did, that I was holding back considerably in describing the full extent of his actions. In 2024, I started writing new posts again and re-visited my former posts to remove the thick level of sugar I had coated on top. Bill Mountjoy is a monster and, if he didn't want others to be aware of his atrocities he should have put more thought into his actions.
In August of 2024, Bill Mountjoy repeatedly asked me how much money I wanted to take down this site. I told him I was not interested; although I believe the facts will show Bill extorted my mother, I'm not going to blackmail him in retaliation. That being said, the "offer" was unauthentic; Bill notoriously clings to every dime to the point that his compulsions surrounding those penny-pinching fears are debilitating. Bill has no intention of paying me at all but it absolutely would not make a difference either way. I am sharing the truth - uncomfortable, of course, but no less accurate. I don't want a payout and I wouldn't accept money in exchange for joining the silence that enabled my mother's suffering.
Bill Mountjoy has threaten to put up his own website, ShelleyMountjoy.com and post things about me that happened over two decades ago. I told him I thought that was a great idea - because it is! Bill continues to be abusive even to this day, so I find it a largely irrelevant that the scandalous stories he has to share about me are over twenty years old (and a bit ironic considering that Bill assumes the role of 'father' whenever it suits him but yet did not try to assist me). Nevertheless, I absolutely encourage anyone to examine my credibility and motivations.
At the end of the day, another lawsuit is the least of my concerns. I am often unsettled with thoughts that Bill will physically hurt me. From my experience, Bill's core nature is extraordinarily retaliatory; I'd be hard pressed to come up with an example of a time Bill solved a serious problem without violence and/or intimidation. Fear of bodily harm has predated this site. I'm certain that, if he thought he would get away with it, Bill would kill me regardless of the existence of this site.
The site exists because my mother wants her story told. And, it exists because I am allowed to tell my story. Even though it's been painful, writing has helped me on my recovery from narcissistic family abuse. Over 6,900 people visited this site in its first three and a half months. Even when I did not add any new material for almost two years, people (a lot of people!) kept visiting - every day. Thank you. I have been so humbled and encouraged by all of you.
I am well-aware that Bill knows about my blog, checks back routinely, and is "not happy" about its contents. More recently, I discovered that Bill Mountjoy is the most frequent visitor to the site. That's certainly his right, but this wasn't written for Bill or those who actively enable him. I absolutely do not care, at all, what Bill Mountjoy thinks of me. This was written for those who want to know our side as well as those who find themselves in a similar situation with a narcissist and/or psychopath.
Although I normally write quickly, these posts have been challenging to put to words - painful to reflect on and, occasionally, personally embarrassing to publish. Yet, there's a freedom that comes from having lost so much. There are recollections here that, for decades, I would not have whispered to a soul. I grew up being told by Nana (Dolores Mountjoy) not to "air our family's dirty laundry" - a form of gaslighting that increased suffering. Ignoring problems doesn't make them go away. Now, these words have been ready by almost everyone I know and thousands of people I have never even met. What has happened to us is atrocious and, if this has to be the way things end, at least people will know. In a way, it's a small slice of justice for my mother.
Several sections of this site are accessible only by account access. Message me (Shelley) directly to set up a time for us to discuss your request one-on-one. If you know me personally, we can probably skip the appointment but you should still reach out to me by email so I can get that set-up for you.
In November of 2022, my computer broke and I have been unable to replace it. It’s tough to type at length when you rely on mobile devices and libraries rather than being able to sit down in your home at your own full keyboard. Therefore, I stopped writing for almost two years.
More recently, I was given an older iPhone from a friend and I started creating short videos on TikTok. As time and resources permit, I am linking those videos here. My username is @goodrollmodel.
Initially, I had been intentionally watering down how grueling the situation was for us. In August 2024, DeNese finally obtained limited access to her lifetime of possessions. I spent ten consecutive days enduring one flashback after another as I frantically searched through her possessions for those items of the most importance - while also going through an eviction trial myself. I have had a hard life but that was, unquestionably, the most demanding time.
The truth is much worse than I originally acknowledged; I knew things were tough for DeNese and I was aware had been whitewashing the memories I shared, but I didn't fully realize it had grown that horrendous for her. Consequently, I am determined to revisit my past posts and add to them, where necessary, and continue documenting as much as possible - even if progress from public computers is slow and cumbersome.
In 1972, George Mason University (GMU) had purchased the first Fairfax High School building on Fairfax Boulevard (formerly, Lee Highway) in the City of Fairfax; it was used as the university’s North Campus for ten years before being sold to the Roman Catholic Diocese of Arlington in 1983 to be used as St. Paul VI Catholic High School. More recently, it has been redeveloped as residential housing - Boulevard VI.
The address was 4168 Baxter Ridge Drive, Prince George, VA 23875. DeNese purchased the home on 10/29/1996 for $144,500 and sold it on 07/02/1999 for $146,950.
"DeNese" goes by her middle name. Legally, her first name is Mary. Up through the late 70's, she would often spell her name "Denice" or "Denise" for the convenience of co-workers and friends.
"Billy" was William Joseph Mountjoy's preferred name from childhood to the mid-90s, when he begin asking to be called "Bill." When possible, have alternated to use the name he chose during the time period being discussed.
The following names have been changed:
Frannie Templeton - DeNese's secretary in the 80's and 90's in Bell Atlantic Nynex Mobile.
LeeAnn Mountjoy - Johnny's first wife in Early Childhood and People.
Hank - Bill's high school friend in Awkward Family Photos.
In 2022, I stated that Bill Mountjoy started working at PBS in 1979. I said that because Bill says that himself - on LinkedIn as well as his printed resume. However, Bill did not start working at PBS until two years later - the summer of 1981. I have since posted his offer letter in my "Viewers Like You" post.
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